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Charlie D and The Fed pt.2

metaphorical_cowboy's picture

In the month leading up to our first buy, I learned about changes in relationships. History lecture went into the silliness of monogamy. At the time, humans were riddled w/ diseases from Aids to Zoonosis. Since teleportation allowed for the specific removal of diseased cells over an hour, discreetness of sexual partners was a thing of the past. This sexual revolution blew away everything before it. The word taboo only applied to yogurt ads now. Incest, as said in the documentary, "ain't no thang". Even now, I find things from my age that I will not cross in this age. The key important thing was the idea of using teleportation for things other than teleporting around.
Teleportation ran off of breaking matter down to the most basic particles. It took time to customize the supply ship to pull the jobs we needed. On occasion I wondered if selling stuff was really the right thing to do. The fact that the ship's log didn't log the auto pilot going down was a sign from God Q Buddha. By loading primary and secondary shields at the same time in close proximity, and broke down mass amount of whatever the substance ordered and spun between the shields using harmonic waves. This actually made the replicator signals harder to pick up than had we simply replicated the stuff on board. When drop point was achieved the original substance signal was used to drop said stuff back into form with less than one percent damaged. While we received no money, the friends made constituted a different profit.
The job went w/o a hitch, the normal job arrived late, but w/ laxed atmosphere no one complained. Boss loved our lack of association w/ the unions who complained and the refusal of companies to drug screen employees made me wonder things. Knowing we had guaranteed stays, shut lips, and off record parts brightened the day.
The next member arrived that day. In even rarer occasions than concerning the sport group, a person can be cryogenically frozen in nature. Such was Oog the Neanderthal’s case. In his time, he'd been a philosopher/musician, assessing mankind's threat. Being eldest at thirty, he was tribe leader. While arranging a truce, mankind slaughtered his group. His last memory was seeing his sixteen y/o prego wife killed. Stabbed, he was left in a cavern to bleed or freeze to death. Through combining both w/ the rare mix of natural hyper stasis required chemicals he survived to awake in a world w/ his kind extinct and his land gone. The elementary education imprinted to read and write did little for the eighty-thousand year old. "If it's any consolation, w/a five percent birth increase or death decrease, your species'd control the planet." Wide eyed, he was injected with double dosage of stabilizers to prevent the counselor’s accidental death.
Charlie D was cool w/ Oog joining. Convincing Oog sounded easy. Closed the windows and lit a quarter. Boy was tweaking in minutes from second hand. He complemented the stuff. Said t'was better'n shrooms and reindeer piss. I left his place learning only that drums didn't originate in Africa.
No revelations passed that month, but one event deserves mention. Charlie D actually beamed us on a stationary Borg pyramid. Moving out of way to a corner, we sat, snort, and watched. They were a colony of ants, each knowledgeable and entwined in an eternity of brethren. He explained they were one of the most important species in existence. Time engrossed us w/ layers of smothering red eyes full of coursing black and neon green stripped snakes. This vision stopped only when a drone mistakenly stepped on my foot. On the way home, I analyzed Charlie D's words. As of late, boy seemed a pinch distant.
Next session revealed Oog best suited for Elvis Impersonation. Charlie D's explanation for Elvis music dominating air stemmed from his explanation for movies. Taming the human mind removed initiative needed for creativity. In reading, I found a nice analogy of those w/no future look to the past b/c it required less thought and is easily available. Had to admit the guy sported the blue suit nice. Didn't seem too pleased w/ the work though.
The lecture dealt w/why the policy of appeasement now worked. T'was easier to agree to not use cloaking than to fight Romulus. Such policy maintained peace, even though Romulans occasionally destroyed Fed ships and conquered Fed space. Such happened w/ every Fed treaty. "Peace works if you're willing to take a blow for the team. The track record speaks for itself", said the counselor. Found out the phrase meaning changed, but had the same purpose. Sending wave after wave of disposable bodies to be killed until the enemy was all killed out made nonviolent protests were invincible.
Oog's salesmanship proved abysmal but his sheer mass of knowledge acquired since his arrival was invaluable. Charlie D explained it came from his environment. In Oog's time, survival depended on wit, but too much mind space stuck to survival. For the moment, his mind was essentially a shark in an infinitely large goldfish tank. However, he'd eventually slow to keep pace. Also, his drumming abilities were amazing. Homeboy was now as smart as me. Seemed Charlie D had both a grasshopper and a cricket.
By this time, we'd amassed the parts required for a ship of our profession. Charlie D even let me name the vessel. Soon, the Funky Fresh would take to the stars. In any given week, we were making around four sales. Certainly didn't sound like much, but we had to be careful. Fed started checking these parts b/c of one of our clients. Now an avid reader, I read one of his books and bitch slapped him, though I quickly apologized. During a conversation, he arrived w/a new thought. He explained we'd (referring to me, Charlie D, and Oog) be evil in any other time, but the Gov't threw the first blow against the mind and soul (though the soul'd had been scientifically disproved generations ago.). So, really we've been fighting fire w/fire. Once the programming was reversed, we'd be villains, but for the moment, we were anti-villians.
Very soon after, the alibi jobs and sessions were holding us back. We'd picked a time to leave. The last lecture concerned the foolishness of the old system concerning economics. Expecting people to pay bills worked in twisted logic only. However, helping people pay their bills made sure that money would arrive. People were given voluntary allowances to which their bills would be send to the gov't at the end of the month. Strict allowances were too hard for people, so when people undoubtedly amounted debt, they sent news to the gov't who would then award them w/punishment free bankruptcy and restart the cycle. This system allowed people to be tracked as well influence product industry faster. Eventually this became too hard and everyone felt it best to simply cut out the middle man and remove the concept of currency.
We packed what was needed and were on our way out when the counselor spotted us carrying luggage. That second, her mind temporarily functioned like a normal ten year old, enough to piece together the general theme of the optical images in front of her. She knew we were on the out and out. Being a gentleman, I pushed her in the closest door and jammed a piece of cloth in the door. It'd keep her confused for a little while. I made ten feet until I recognized the room was Freddy's. Being a gentleman, I walked back and kicked open the door. Even knowing Freddy, I nearly threw up seeing his room. The walls, floor, and ceiling were covered w/pages of child pornography by what I can only hope was glue. The room was drenched w/ humidity. Boy seemed surprised at my expression of catching him w/ his pants down. Seems she hit her head on the table when falling in (Felt pretty bad for that one). Figured I wouldn't be coming back, so I took into the hall pulling him by shirt collar. He tried pleading, explaining the magazines were legal, sent from the gov't in fact. All to make sure he could keep his urges under control. "Ain't like'm hurt'n 'em'n r'l lurfe", boy said.
Jive turkey was zipped by the time we reached the window. I gave him a quick kick to the groin area, blackening his eye as he collapsed inward from pain. He sank to the floor covering his tear filled face. Said he didn't deserve the unprovoked self-righteous egotistical physical attack based on ancient unjustified non egalitarian social standards. I began punching him until he shut. I'm not of the intellectual class, but I suspected he could neither spell, nor define any of those words excluding "on". With a quick push, gravity did the rest of the killing as he fell about ten stories. The onlookers weren't sure what to do. The last person to die by falling happened over a century. Both Charlie D and Oog gazed at me wide eyed. The rest of the escape was uneventful.
By this time, both Oog and I had learned much in the ways of programming and craftiness. Teleporters and replicators remained important. By removing various safety gauges, not only could stuff be made on board, the menu record settings no longer functioned. Stenography, stopped b/c the first practical uses pertained to Freddy's reading material, allowed images to hide w/in images. Layering copied codes on product and ship disguised as normal according to local space customs. We passed through herds of Fed ships hunting us b/c of it. The illusion held for only a minute should they use visual, but they were too sophisticated. On occasions, we combined techniques. The bishield method, the code trick, even covered the the entire hull w/stuff. They never checked. W/ Oog's help, we always had backup ideas. I refused using some. Extending bisheilds to unsuspecting ships, called donkies was one. Holding stuff in subspace, phony satellites, allowing ship’s warp vacuum to pull cloaked shipments to their destination based on minute trajectory changes, and other manners worked very effectively.
All was well until we were caught. Author took an offer he'd wished he'd refused. Funky Fresh's fast, but we couldn't outrun a mini armada. Honestly, in Fed history, there've only been about ten good captains. Six of them worked together for this plan. Kind of sucked they didn't understand the word overkill. As soon as we dropped from warp, we were covered. From behind, a great many ships popped from subspace blocking the escape. Subspace and cloaking dampeners combined with seven tractor beams, EMP's, scrambler scramblers, warp drive/wave inhibitors. The screen showed there to be enough power to decimate worlds upon worlds. On the plus side, I handled the situation better than the last shock of this magnitude.
We were escorted by four klingons to the holding cells, where we were read our rights. The other two were read the many charges of possession charges. I'd been charged w/ all those plus the murder of over one hundred civilians. They explained when I'd deprogrammed the apartment's shields it affected all the building's settings on the grid. Engineers were so proud of their work, it was policy to jump towards the windows to test the shields. Even after watching the prior plummet, the rest continued jumping. I felt like a man who'd too late realized the error in building a squirrel farm next to a power line station. Their captain asked me to walk w/him. Released from my cell, but hand and foot cuffed, we walked. He told everything I'd told the author. Then he really started talking.
"Let me fill in some holes in history. To stop war and destruction, new people, thinking, and governments were needed. For permanent safety, the past's present had to be sacrificed. The fathers of the Federation used their financial and political power to set the stage for change in the second millennium. Bloodshed was needed for the human subconscious to beg for authority and not question govt's necessity. Hitting young minds first, anti-gov’t propaganda media under guise of music, television, movies, and literature glorifying counter culture behavior slowly sabotaged confidence in the system. Religious conflicts were started for the purpose of speeding the process. No one ever suspected the "2 for 1" abortion coupons originated from us. Thousands of the same writers responsible for reality television helped rewrite history. Religion's credibility died w/believers' end time claims. W/o backbone, people believed anything showing their administration poorly. Three billion saw one of Iraq's fabled nukes blow up in Syria. We called it a politically biased anti-progressive ploy and they bought it. Progressives cheered our names as we took their weapons. We took their property rights and they begged us to deflower their daughters and sons. After the needless wars fell, we appeared from the dust and reminded them where we'd been. The appearance of aliens only helped speed up order and peace. The vulcans found out about the mood stabilizers, but kept shut knowing their place. Although it seems the Gov't is forgetting its place, order still stands, and if war starts, citizens are no longer willing to fight for their planet." Stupidly, I questioned why he was telling me this. He went to say it was because I was about to die.
I figured his words and bit his nose, quickly exchanging the phaser's ownership. While he tried coaxing the weapon from me, I noticed the shiny paperweight on his desk. Boy offered it for the phaser so I dropped the weapon. He neither registered the weight as dangerous nor felt the blow. Finding he'd intelligently kept the cuff keys on him, I exited in my new suit (still w/Perkins on) carrying my new phaser.
Bumping into the author by chance, I wedged him in the space between the window and outside shield then gently nudged him. He sounded like plastic rubbing against Styrofoam. After dispatching some anonymous guards, the three of us were onboard Funky Fresh. Charlie D and I'd've died if not for Oog. Using the captor ship's comm system, the emitted signals triggered safety malfunctions, replicating mad amounts of opium spores, then bouncing repeat signals to the next ship to begin freaking. The signal was stopped halfway through the lot, which was for the best. Oog's second program repeated the same action only involving ball bearings and explosions. The shields lit up, but in stupidity, only blocked doors from damage. I felt bad when the Domino boys cracked at the Fed after catching word of this battle. Two ships perused, either able to killify us.
The first shot killed the shields, weakened from the bisheild technique. The second killed the left engine. Charlie D said "Rule the collective kindly, Grasshopper", then disappeared into the right engine space. W/ the third shot damaging life support, I sat down and put a brown paper bag under my head thinking I'd had a good run. The computer fired a "Manuel Override" and something amazingish happened. The future declared only energy based weapons worked. Tons of metal exceeding fourteen times the speed of light never clicked. The right engine took off through the first ship, and exploded in the second ship. Luckily the first ship protected us from the shrapnel of the second. The external solar wind collectors allowed us to land Funky Fresh on the closest satellite. The escape pod was a life saver and soon we split up.
I spent a while deep in space where I found some neat semi-addictions. Each new sensory organ yielded new perceptions. Having Z-ray vision alone is enough for me to wake up in the morning. Away from Fed influence, I stayed out of trouble. I'd've had every sense operation had my room not exploded. Eventually I tracked down Oog to find he unofficially owned a planet. While the little blue Neanderthals played in the yard, Uni explained the details concerning everything. Seducing one's assassin was a stroke of genius. After retrieving The Funky Fresh, the ideas were flowing. Gene specific skin lotions for forged DNA scans and skin-tight low emission holograms made for free movement. The replicator programs make for wonderful backup since the Fed's done nothing to protect their systems. The buzzards that swarmed in during our absence won't anything coming.
I judged my one female audience's facial expression at this point. She showed interest, though she'd been nibbling on a single cracker during the pound's duration. Even in my burnt state, I saw the Furengi assassin in the next room by their signature hat. For dramatic sake, I aimed my wrist at the paper thin wall and flexed/thought my arm muscles. Homeboy never felt the stinger touch him. When he crashed onto the table, the girl rolled to the floor. I tapped her on the shoulder w/ my vestigial tail to get her attention. The lighting was perfect for the outlaw pose combined w/ Perkins flowing. I didn't even have to ask if she wanted in.
"Alabaster Lester, Z9 Sanchez, and Joe Kigabachi are going down.”